{"product_id":"funny-golden-retriever-bottle-opener","title":"Funny Golden Retriever Bottle Opener | Golden Owner Gift","description":"\u003ch2\u003eThe Golden Retriever Bottle Opener: Enthusiastically Helpful Since Never\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYour Golden Retriever would absolutely retrieve that bottle cap for you, after dropping it in a mud puddle, presenting it with unbridled joy, and expecting a standing ovation. This \u003cstrong\u003efunny golden retriever bottle opener\u003c\/strong\u003e captures that same enthusiastic energy, minus the slobber and the need for constant validation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003e\n\u003cmeta charset=\"utf-8\"\u003e\n\u003cspan\u003eAnother Golden Retriever that Delivers Joy\u003c\/span\u003e\n\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLoyalty:\u003c\/strong\u003e Will never leave your wallet. Unlike your Golden, who \"just wants to say hi\" to every single person at the brewery.\u003cstrong\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eProduct Specs (The Boring But Necessary Stuff)\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eSize:\u003c\/strong\u003e 3.4\" x 2.16\" (wallet-sized, great for travel)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMaterial:\u003c\/strong\u003e Stainless steel (tougher than your Golden's stomach, which is saying something)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eWeight:\u003c\/strong\u003e Lightweight enough to carry everywhere, unlike your 75-lb lap dog\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDurability:\u003c\/strong\u003e Built to last longer than your Golden's attention span (approximately forever)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eMaintenance:\u003c\/strong\u003e Wipe clean. No grooming appointments required.\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003ch3\u003eWhy Golden Retriever Owners Need This\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eYou love your Golden. You really do. But sometimes you need a helper who doesn't require you to throw something 47 times in a row or pretend that bringing you a dead bird is the highlight of your day. This bottle opener delivers Golden Retriever-level enthusiasm without the vet bills, the fur tumbleweeds, or the mysterious ability to find every mud puddle in a 10-mile radius.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003ePerfect for:\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGolden Retriever owners \u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eDog lovers with a sense of humor (dry, like this bottle opener)\u003cbr\u003e\n\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eGifts for people whose entire personality is \"dog lover\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cem\u003eThis funny golden retriever bottle opener won't judge you for opening a cold one at noon. Your actual Golden won't either, but they'll definitely want to be involved somehow.\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Sly Dawg Studio","offers":[{"title":"Default Title","offer_id":51001086837014,"sku":"BOT-D-231","price":13.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0822\/3021\/4934\/files\/funny-golden-retriever-bottle-opener-sly-dawg-studio_998c2cb3-b01a-4bcb-9940-2f3b460ab517.png?v=1769816871","url":"https:\/\/slydawgstudio.com\/products\/funny-golden-retriever-bottle-opener","provider":"Sly Dawg Studio","version":"1.0","type":"link"}